My brain works in funny ways.. I know this and I will be the first to admit it! As I found myself looking back, I started comparing the things that made me happy as a little girl to what makes me happy nowadays... I am embarrased to admit it, but in the shower this morning, as I was thinking about my favorites, and Julie Andrews voice starting singing the famous song from The Sound of Music.. "these are a few of my favorite things.." ( I TOLD you my mind works in funny ways...)
|Age 7 pictured with my monkey George...|
|Age 17.. ready to take on the world!|
Now here I am.. 10 years after that. Soon to be 27, I have done MOST of what I expected to do. Graduated from college, married to an amazing man, and the mother of beautiful children. We work hard to scratch out a living in this uncertain world and uncertain times. My comfortable cocoon is no more however, due to the fact that I found out a secret well kept by my parents. Life is HARD. Life doesn't always work out the way you want it to, and EVEN if you do everything you can, it isn't always enough. These were hard truths to digest over the years. My easy, predictable life is no more. I have worries and nagging doubts and even lose sleep over the hard knocks that life sends our way.
I was talking to my Dad the other day, bemoaning the fact that we just cannot seem to make it... I was feeling like a failure in fact... and my dear dad just shook his head. " Rachel, you are judging by the wrong standards." he told me. I needed that reminder. I needed it badly. By the world's standards, yes we are struggling... just as so MANY others are. But by God's standards, what a wealth we truly have! God is supplying our EVERY need... how could I forget that fact? God will not judge me at the end of my life for how big of a house we live in, or how much money was in my bank account, but by how I lived my life. He will look to see the fruit of the spirit that bloomed over the span of time and how I let my light shine to the world.
|Brian and I during the first month of our relationship <3|
I am now looking forward to compiling another list at 37.. :) I wonder how ten years will change this list- or if it will at all.. I guess I will just have to wait and see!