Thursday, August 30, 2012

Confessions from a Mommy of Three....

My mind, even on a good day is sometimes a dangerous place to be.  As I dove into a monstrously large pile of clean laundry that needed to be folded like 2 weeks ago, I found my mind wandering.  ( Anyone that knows me at all knows this is tied up with bathroom cleaning as my least favorite chore)  Keeping my mind busy while I fold endless shirts, shorts and undies is a defense mechanism against thinking about this most distasteful chore...

I found and posted one of my favorite verses this evening on Facebook.   "Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths.  Proverbs 3:5-6"   This verse started tumbling through my head while I was matching and rolling socks (ewwwww)  and it hit me how hypocritical I have been this summer.  I learned that verse long ago, and at times I have thought about its meaning.  But I haven't been trusting, acknowledging or looking for direction, NOPE I have been wallowing in the enormity of the situation I have been in and trying to handle the whole thing on my own. And how might you ask have I been handling this on my own???  Not well at all... shocker, I know!

The realization of all of this tonight has given me the perspective I have been lacking since June.  The endless days of kids, work, kids, housecleaning, kids, small doses of sleep and then back to kids, work, kids ... well you get the picture.... has left me frazzled, mean, distant, distraught and at the end of my rope. 

I am ending my ramblings for the evening.  The kiddos are fresh out of the bath, in pj's and tucked into bed for the night.  The laundry is folded... still on the table but folded!!  The kitchen is semi-clean and I am dragging myself to bed for the evening.  The cycle doesn't end, but my attitude sure can.  My path right now is kids, work, kids, housecleaning and kids...  I choose to trust in Him and follow this path as far as He takes me.  My blessings come from those kiddos and the journey Brian and I are on in this thing called life.

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